The Resourced Leaders Guide #5 Individual Resiliency v Systems Change
Hey there, Resourced Leaders community! First off, I want to apologize for the delay in this week's newsletter. My whole family, including yours truly, has been hit by a bout of illness, which is why the newsletter is a tad late. In the past, I probably would have powered through it. It's something many of us do, right? We push ourselves to the brink because we feel the weight of modern expectations, the relentless pace set by capitalism, and the pressure to conform to this fast-paced world.
We're taught that rest is unproductive and that illness is a sign of weakness. I used to find it incredibly difficult to rest, especially when sick, thanks to a crippling fear of letting others down. There was this nagging worry that if I didn't deliver on my consulting work, I'd lose out on future opportunities. Fortunately, I've managed to shift a lot of that mindset over the years. I've become much better at taking care of myself and allowing rest when needed.
In fact, during this recent spell of illness, I took the opportunity to sit in longer meditations and engage in ceremony. It's been surprising to discover the insights and guidance that have emerged from these moments of rest. It's a reminder that sometimes, productivity isn't about doing more but about diving within.
I'm also in the process of becoming certified as a Trauma of Money Coach, and that's been quite the journey. It's stirred up old beliefs and fears that needed attention. So, in a way, resting has been productive because it's given me the time and space to process this work too.
You see, we often equate productivity with external actions, looking outside ourselves for answers and solutions. But the more I've worked on myself, the more I've realized that going within is one of the most potent resources and courses of action I have.
Now, I'm curious about you. How good are you at resting? What emotions or thoughts come up when you think about resting or taking time off, especially when you're unwell? If you notice any discomfort or fear around this, I invite you to get curious and examine it. Is there a belief that's ready to be released, or perhaps a fear that's holding you back? Have you internalized beliefs about capitalism and the patriarchy that no longer serve you?
Individual Resiliency V Systems Change
Okay, let's shift gears a bit. I had originally planned to focus this newsletter on nervous system regulation, but that can wait until next week. Instead, I'd like to share something I've been mulling over: the delicate balance between individual resiliency and systems change. There's a significant tension at the heart of this conversation, a tug of war between focusing on our internal resiliency through self-improvement, healing and personal growth, trauma work and the imperative need to transform systemic issues like capitalism, racism and the patriarchy – and the structures that are grounded in them that feel like they weren't built for anyone's well-being.
I recently wrote this blog about it I'd love to hear your thoughts on it.
Practical Exercise: The Personal Resiliency Check-In
In the hustle and bustle of our daily lives, we often forget to check in with ourselves and assess our resiliency. This simple exercise can help you gauge where you stand and identify areas that might need a bit of nurturing. Here's how it works:
1. Find a Quiet Space: Take a moment to step away from distractions and find a quiet space where you can have some uninterrupted time for self-reflection.
2. Settle In: Sit comfortably or lie down, whatever feels right for you. Close your eyes if you're comfortable doing so.
3. Take a Few Deep Breaths: Inhale deeply through your nose, counting to four. Hold your breath for a count of four, and then exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of four. Repeat this process three times to help calm your nervous system.
4. Reflect on Your Resiliency:Now, ask yourself: "How resilient do I feel right now?" Rate your resiliency on a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being extremely low and 10 being incredibly high.
5. Explore Your Feelings: Dive a bit deeper. What emotions or sensations are you experiencing in your body as you reflect on your resiliency? Are there any specific thoughts or worries that come to mind?
6. Identify Areas of Concern: Based on your reflection, identify one or two areas where you feel your resiliency might need some attention. These could be emotional, physical, or mental aspects that require nurturing. They may also be ways that systems around you are impacting on your sense of resiliency.
7. Set an Intention: Close this exercise by setting an intention. It could be as simple as "I intend to prioritize self-care this week" or "I intend to explore a new relaxation technique." It could also be bigger like “I intend to find a workplace that feels safe for me to work in.”
Remember, resiliency is an ongoing journey. There are internal components we can take care of and we also need to work together to create systems change. Regularly checking in with yourself like this can help you maintain and enhance your internal resiliency over time.
Stay tuned for more discussions on resiliency, self-care, and trauma informed leadership. Until next time, take a moment to nurture your own well-being.
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